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Monday, January 11, 2016

Pull Don’t Push


I’d like a show of hands, does anybody else besides me have fears, uncomfortable feelings or limiting beliefs? Just as I suspected, you’re all just as human as me. And if that is the case, you most likely run from or try to stymie the voice of those little buggers. The goal? Avoidance, and if we’re really lucky, temporary amnesia that they even have a designated space in our mind.

So we swat at and shove away those parts of us that prevent us from living our dream or full potential. “Don’t give them power!” we are instructed. They only way we can imagine to do so is to shove ‘em all off the cliffs of our conscious awareness. Push them away, until they can’t find their way home. But they always do, don’t they? It may take seconds or even months but inevitably they come to tap us on the shoulder once more and like Jack Nicholson in The Shining proclaim, “I’m baacck.”  In another vain attempt, we kick them to the curb and give our death stare as we shout, “Outta my way!” Round and round we go.

How can I unload these suckers, we wonder. I’m trying to ignore them. I’ve pushed them to the side, yet they continue to worm their way back into my heart and psyche. Might I suggest another approach is in order? It seems on logical as the old way hasn’t met with much success. I know it might rattle a few cages out there, but perhaps we should be pulling our personal nuisances towards us for a warm embrace or friendly 1:1.

I only suggest this seemingly farfetched approach because I’ve been the guinea pig already and I’m here to tell you that it works. It is quite the simple and handy little tool for efforts at personal growth and compassion.

The How-to:
- Identify whatever thought, emotion or unhealthy personal mantra is plaguing you.
-Now imagine how said issue(s) would manifest in physical form. It might take on the shape of a person, yourself or someone else, or it might just be a shape or color. It may appear as another creature, animal or physical object. Whatever it is that comes to you is just fine, there is no hard and fast rule here.
-Next, observe what the newly revealed vision needs and address that need. Does it need a hug, acceptance, kindness or a compassionate listening ear? Does it simply want to be seen and/or what does it want to say to you or teach you? Can you take a moment, it doesn’t need to be hours, to say, “I see you. I hear you. I feel you and I care.” This isn’t about holding onto, but kindly holding.

-Repeat as necessary.

Ta, dah, you’re done.

You’re not left breathless from your latest sprint from the demons that reside within. What you are left with is a greater calm and a discovery that all those icky things were not as scary as you’d imagined and that you possess the skills to care for yourself. This, my friends is one of the many ways to take your power back from the chaos. You may find that some require further explorations but this is a much more mindful and loving approach to all parts that are you.

Give it a try, you’ve nothing to lose but stress, and let me know how you make out.


Be well and happy.

(One order of business: Per Google you will now be required to have a Google account in order to read & follow this blog. I hope you consider doing just that! Thanks.)


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